Academy Awards review by Monkey Critic
Last night monkey watch the 78th Annual Academy Awards. For three and a half hours! Why stupid humans take so long to give out little statues? Probably because they showed 37 montages of old movies. And so many speeches. Monkey not care that you thank your grandmother and agent. Keep show moving so monkey can laugh at humans in funny dresses with ridiculous giant poofy bows on one shoulder like the one worn by otherwise pretty lady Charlize Theron.
Pretty lady with silly bow
And monkey very very upset to see so many humans in the Kodak Theater! Clearly they not want to boycott like monkey asked. King Kong winning stupid Oscars for sound mixing and visual effects not enough! There no excuse for Kong not winning Best Actor. Monkey very unhappy with the complete lack of simian presence on entire show (except for another stupid careerbuilders.com commercial). If Academy not nominate any non-hominid primates next year, monkey might recruit all monkey's friends and simian-friendly humans to start media campaign and protest show with pickett line outside.
Or monkey might just fling poo.
Probably just fling poo.
Monkey rate 78th Annual Academy Awards no bananas. Monkey rate all humans who went to show instead of boycotting negative one million bananas.
Pretty lady with silly bowAnd monkey very very upset to see so many humans in the Kodak Theater! Clearly they not want to boycott like monkey asked. King Kong winning stupid Oscars for sound mixing and visual effects not enough! There no excuse for Kong not winning Best Actor. Monkey very unhappy with the complete lack of simian presence on entire show (except for another stupid careerbuilders.com commercial). If Academy not nominate any non-hominid primates next year, monkey might recruit all monkey's friends and simian-friendly humans to start media campaign and protest show with pickett line outside.
Or monkey might just fling poo.
Probably just fling poo.
Monkey rate 78th Annual Academy Awards no bananas. Monkey rate all humans who went to show instead of boycotting negative one million bananas.
4 Comments:
Yes, that is a silly bow. Nice hair, though.
For the record Monkey Critic, ATR did not even watch the Oscars. I never watch the Oscars. I used to think it was because I didn't care to hear people thank (as you said) their grandmother and their agent. Now, I know, it's because they never have any non-hominid primate nominees!
By
ATR, at 1:58 PM
wait, though.....
That means you watched them!!!!!!!!!!!
I boycotted for you!!!!
*sniff*cry*
By
Ali, at 9:08 PM
atr: Monkey glad you finally realize truth.
ali: Monkey's boycott was for humans not to go to ceremony. How can monkey be critic if not watch Oscars? Monkey hoped nobody would show up and they would give out Oscars in empty theater, but clearly not enough humans care about the plight of non-hominid primates in Hollywood.
By
Monkey Critic, at 9:20 AM
ahh, ok, my mistake. Fair enough. Extra bananas for you for my misunderstanding
I left you comments on my blog and on Ninjamunkey's blog, by the way...
By
Ali, at 7:38 PM
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